these two days, moments of fed up-ness threatened to consume the whole of me. it is not easy being yourself and being nice. and i am having some problems coping now.

yes i am fucking noisy/crazy/ugly/fat/unglam/lame/nonsensical/whatever you damn.

but so what. seriously?
someone else loves me, and that is many someone ELSE-es, mind you.
and if you haven't noticed how rude it is to ask someone to shut up, you can tell your friend to try it on you someday.
and that's quite insensitive huh.
seriously i wouldnt give a damn about entertaining you if i dun give a damn.


pardon me but....

ester's quote of the day: (would still be)
kindness is not my weakness, it is your good luck.

to disgress,
today was the international relations class and i think i am gg to flunk it. =)
one question if i rememebered well, goes like this....

'do you agree with the author's analysis about the stability of the nation-states in the 20th century?'

i can just cry. and who the hell knows if 'united states of europe is going to happen in 10 years or so?'
i need to ask some fortune teller, and that takes time you know.

haha. i am so pissed i think i will snap anytime. but i have to contain it. without being fake. shit. hate acting angelic. sometimes i wish i can shut up and stop trying to make people laugh.
it makes me feel pathetic and lame and now, FREAKING not appreciated.

therefore as of now, thou shall not,
1) say funny things (even if you think its not funny)
2) act stupid (when obviously i am not)
3) tell too much about myself (i know you are not interested, so well)

=) thank you for making me so horrible. the most horrible-est day here in paris is happening. wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
thou shall not cry. and continue to feel like i am a freak, a loser and someone so unwanted.